Homeland Security to Make Artificial Noses

Bonnie Kristian's picture
By Bonnie Kristian at 11:29PM
The Department of Homeland Security, keeping our best interest at heart as per usual, is working on new technology which will act as an artificial nose, smelling airport passengers as they go through security.  If all goes as planned, the noses will be able to report to security workers not only the passengers' emotions - fear, anger, and other emotions all produce their own unique scents - but also, in some cases, their identities:
The technology builds on recent breakthroughs in finding human scent-prints which, many researchers believe, may be as unique to individuals as fingerprints...Homeland Security wants a device that automatically compares odours with scents collected from crime scenes and held in a “smell bank” which, like DNA or fingerprints, could be used in court.
The devices will also be programmed to distinguish and ignore common perfumes, which could otherwise interefere with identification.  I'm thinking purchasing some obscure off-brand perfumes and applying them heavily whenever I go to the airport is going to start looking like a good idea...
Nothing surprises me anymore, if they can scan every crack and crevice of your body, make you wait in line for hours, humiliate you, run rough shod over Federal Bill of rights constraints, they can do anything. When I go to Toronto this summer, I want to drive instead of put up with this bullshit.
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Is there even a point to this?
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You mean other than it being another step toward a nanny state... BWI in Baltimore already has rudimentary versions of those. They're called Sentinel II's, and they sniff for metal...everyone's afraid to pick that security line because they're so intimidating. Not to mention the Marylin Monroe effect for women wearing skirts... I wonder if they'll be able to distinguish anger directed toward unconstitutional searches as opposed to a general smoldering House-style ire?
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